Really don't understand why I can't have better treatment from my family members to make up for the lack of a complete and normal family.
Have parents that I can hardly hold a conversation with cause there's nothing to talk about. A sister who is an unreasonable fuck. And 4houses, none of which I can actually call home.
Now I sound like an attention seeking parasite. Whoop whoop, cheers for you Annessa.
You're pathetic.

When you told me that I was a star in the sky,
Baby I believed every word.
And you seemed so sincere,
It was perfectly clear,
Cause forever was all that I heard.
And every little kiss,
From your tender lips,
Couldn't of been a lie.
I fell hard over head,
Without a safty net,
And I don't understand this goodbye.

Was I the only one who fell in love?
There never really was the two of us.
And maybe my all just wasn't good enough.
Was I the only one, only one, in love?

As I walk down the hall,
See the place on the wall,
Where the picture of us used to be.
I fight back those tears, cause I still feel you here.
How could you walk out so easily?
And I don't understand, how I can feel this pain, and still be alive.
And all these broken dreams,
And all these memories,
Are killing me inside.

Was I the only one who fell in love?
There never really was the two of us.
And maybe my all just wasn't good enough.
Was I the only one, only one,
Tell me, what I'm supposed to do with all this love?
Baby, it was supposed to be the two of us.
Help me, cause I still don't want to believe.

I was the only one.
I was the only one.
I the only one who fell in love.
There never really was the two of us, hey.
And maybe my all just wasn't good enough.
I the only one, the only one.
I the only one who fell in love.
There never really was the two of us.
And maybe my all just wasn't good enough.
Was I the only one, the only one, in love?

When you told me that I was a star in the sky,
Baby I believed every word

Recently been quite troubled by a number of things, but I think i've sorted my thoughts out and I know what to do, if I have the courage that is.

Things started out simple but it's gotten to this, I've gotta stop before things get more complicated.
Sorry if anybody gets hurt but, as I said "长痛不如短痛". <-- (oh shit idk if im right LOL)
Hurt for a short while instead of a long period of time.

So i dont wanna drag things, before I fall any deeper.
Im so sorry.

Easier said than done.

I have so many things on my mind right now gah.

I dug myself in so deep without thinking, now things have gotten like this..
What should I do.

Those are pictures for New Year! Went to Marina Barage.

Want to post a lot of things leh but.. aiya.
Used to think nobody reads my blog one but recently found out that isnt true so i dont dare post that freely anymore LOL.


p/s: i really REALLY hate my birthday, why couldnt my mum give birth to me anytime else.. sigh.

So this is the post where i post my 2012 resolutions where i wont even attempt to do 80% of them.
But whatever right? Hehahu.

----------------------
[in the order of what comes into mind)

#1) Be more sociable

People I know probably think I'm friendly and sociable, but really i have issues making new friends and talking to people I don't know.

When there are people I'm not close with around, I tend to be super quiet and try to be invisible y'know what im saying? And during outings if there are people I'm not close with going, then bye bye im not going.

So this year im gonna try to be friendlier, first stop: Orientation Camp'12!!!



#2) Study more, play less.

This is probably one of the important ones. Notice I didnt say NO playing that's cause I know I wont manage to NOT play around. But this year's an important year 'cause it's O's!!

I really dont want to disappoint. Be it myself, my parents, everyone who cares enough. I'm not smart, so im gonna have to work harder.


#3) Figure out where I wanna go in life.

It's like everyone has a goal, what school they wanna get into and into what course. While Im here, clueless as ever. I dont even know whether I wanna get into a Poly/JC.

When people ask me the "What do you wanna do when you grow up?" question, mostly im like "Plastic surgeon. 'Cause can earn lotsa money." but really, i dont know if i'll love my job. And im not good enough at dance to be a dancer, sigh regrets.


#4) Be a nicer person.

Im really unreasonable and stuck-up sometimes.(or all the time) I wanna be humble and nice!!!! Whoa that was short.


#5) Be punctual.

Its rare that im ever on time. Friends would definitely know this. So I wanna TRY to be punctual.


#6)Dance more

'Nuff said.


tired so maybe i'll continue another time.
school's in 1 more day hahahaha.

I must admit that I hadn't thought of posting this before, I saw people doing it and I thought it'd be a good idea to do so too. K la i no originality, whatever LOL.

So basically this post will be dedications and reflections about 2011, I really wanna complete this before 2011 ends.. but i doubt i can 'cause it's 1.27am and I'm going out tmrw. Try my best ah.

Sorry if you dont like wordy posts, byebye!

So right now I'm trying to manage texting 4 people at once with this shitty laggy ass phone and listening to sad songs.

Here goes nothing:




--------------------

This year, I feel like everyone's grown so much and has become mature. And along with them, I have matured in some way too. I no longer bother about the trivial unimportant things and i laugh at silly things i used to think and do in the past. This is how you know you're growing up right? When you can look back at laugh at your former self.

This year has been eventful i guess. New class of 3/6E > Coping with studies > Modern Dance SYF > SYF closing ceremony > Teachers' Day performance > Moon Festival performance > Chingay practices > Prom Nite performance > Braces > 3/6 chalet > USS trip
Ok that's all I remember at the moment whoops.

• I'm really anti-social one, so when I first entered 3/6 im like 'wtf no im gonna be forever alone' but surprisingly i made some really good friends and i've grown to adore my class.

Like my 3/6 clique consisting of Gekkhee, Jiajing, Rhynade, Vianne, Jozoe, Jiayin.♥ And also the cute boys in my class such as Aaron, Hongze, Weixiong, Benedict(abit scary), Wenjun, Yeongjian, Yihong etcetc.

Thanks for making class enjoyable and kudos to us for making 2 teachers storm out of class this year. Lmao ok not something to be proud of.



• During SYF training, it was really hardcore and stressful for everyone. The atmosphere was always tight and everytime I tried to lift up the mood I would screw something up and get pointed out by Mrs Chong.(which feels horrible btw)

In the process, our relationships have gotten closer and new friendships made. Since everybody was working towards a common goal, we all worked pretty well together and created many smiles and laughters.♥

I'm glad it's over and even though we fell hard 'cause we got our hopes too high, I am proud of what we have gone through and it's the process that counts right? RS Modern Dance will always be a part of me.



• I was really skeptical about SYF Closing Ceremony but I can honestly say it's one of the best things that happened to me this year. Everyone attended the first training as strangers and performed on stage as friends and fellow dancers.

Despite the tiny arguments, we made many friends from different schools. Some I never would be friends with if not for the event.

Thanks for the memories. And I still miss the stupid trainings.♥



• I have blogged about Teachers' Day performance before so I'm just gonna say J3ACE ftw!



• We were pretty stoked up for the Prom Nite performance and it was quite the experience 'cause we were the first ones to try a dance genre entirely different from the norm ballet and modern dance.

Though people laughed at us, it's ok. Pft.



• I have lower braces right now and even though I'll be ugly duckling for the next 2 years or so, I hope i have pretty teeth in the future. :>


Summed up my year.

--------------------

Dedications time! (oh boy this is gonna be long)



JOEYGOH
the bitch.♥

Hi you sucker. I hope you read this and die. NO LA JK LOL.
I know we always talk about this but i still can't believe how childish and stupid we were a few years ago haha. Used to bully you like mad but see where we wind up now? We're practically soulmates hehahu.

I like how you confide in me, telling me every single thing and being totally honest with me, makes me feel more important than you'll ever know. Also doing stupid stuffs together, you being my "mother", and more!

I know you've been broken a lot of times in your 爱情 but like i always say "you asked for it" LOL. I know i damn asshole but I really hope you stop falling for the wrong guys and find someone worthy of you ok!

I hope we remain friends until we are old and wrinkly. Remember the secret tunnel from my future house to your future house ok :> ♥




JESLYNPOH
Jpmf.♥

We grew closer this year right! Thanks for always being my unglam partner and do stuff with no restrictions. Also, thanks for teaching me maths and chi all the time.. you must be the most patient person to teach me man. I know outside you look super calm but inside you must be raging and cursing "YOU STUPID BITCH Y SO DUMB?!" right.. i know one i know one. Hehe.

I know you super stress also, about dance about school work about your 丰富 lovelife(LOLOLOL). I like how you tell me your stuffs, makes me feel impt! You sometimes very slow ah and you abit lame and you always insist that you taller than me(you in denial), but nevermind la i like can alrd.

You recently very sad ah.. no matter what i'll be here ok. Just come to me anytime you need me! You sad, I sad ok. So dont be sad.♥




GEKKHEEGAN
Geksai.♥

HAHA i stil remember that fateful day how I created that nickname. We've known each other for about 7years already. Even though we got close only around secondary school. We used to be soulmates but things change, its ok you're still one of my oldies hehe ♥

Thanks for making me smile and laugh at your sillyness and for all the unglam sessions! Those really made my day, just being with you makes me high. Huhu you're like my happy pill(when you're not in a bad mood) :>

Remember we said we would grow old together and wear wonderb**s?! Good memories hehe. And, Im still counting on it.♥




VIANNETAN
bitch#2.♥

Still remember few years ago we had many stupid conflicts? Hahaha so silly of us.
I'm glad after all that happened, we're still close friends. You seriously damn funny, can go be comedian already! I always laugh until cry one leh.

Thanks for all the laughter and tears(of joy)! You super smart sia, hate you. You're one of the people I'm super comfortable with, like not awkward at all! Kpoppers too huhu.

You're really awesome and funny, dont ever belittle yourself ok. You are more than meets the eye.♥




LEEXIAOYUN
Ahyun.♥

Oldie! Wah wah we very 厉害, know each other for like 8years already. Only grew closer during secondary but you were always there :>

Even though sometimes you close yourself out and be like super emo, most of the time you very high and irritating(HAHA) so its ok hehe! Thanks for entertaining my bullshit during MT class if not i sure die of boredom. You make MT classes a bit more endurable..

Thanks for always making notes for me during classes too aww so nice of you. I know you always feel left out, but dont feel that way leh i still love you no matter how much i throw your stuff around and irritate you one! ♥




GEORGEPOO
dongku.♥

Haaaaai. Also dont know when we started talking but you very nice to talk to la despite you scolding me all the time(zzz damn asshole one). You're like super funny lo, always make me laugh in the middle of the night and get me scolded also.

Thanks for spending my 15th birthday with me, aww was touched by your mohawk horse and your stupid monkey card ok. And ikea meatballs! Damn noob one you never eat before haha. Sank you for all the laughter.

Rarely talk to you now imy sia but i know you're living the good life so it's cool. Hope you get your ideal O's results and get into the course you want, then you can find all the 美女 you want hehahu! All the best!

Dont forget me pls, and rmb you'll always be my bff :> ♥




KAHSENGLEW
Ahseng.♥

Hi bro! Honestly I think you're the best bro already lor, how i wish you were my biological bro. You damn nice when you're nice(LOL) and super gentleman also. Also very sweet to 222 hehahu.

You graduate already I how sia? Who send me home? )':
I say a lot of times already, but you better not forget me hor. I will be damn sad. You're one of my best guy friends y'know, you zhu ba dan. Love how you always know when im sad but holding it in.

Hope you get good results so can get into same school as her and FINALLY start your fairytale with her ok. You always MIA one sibei sian.

Bros ok! Thanks for everything!♥




JIAHUITAN
Hippo.♥

HAHAHAHA LOL AT YOUR NICKNAME DONT KILL ME OK.
Ah girl ah, must learn to cover your mouth while yawning, damn unglam one leh. Even though sometimes I want to strangle you to death 'cause you so slow but thanks for being stupid so i can laugh hehahu!!!

Actually you quite smart lor, but the Melvin gorilla always say you stupid. I also know you always feel inferior but there's no need la, you're perfectly fine.

Thanks for being lame hehe.♥




JIAJINGGOH
auntie.♥

Most aunty award goes to you, hands down! Haha super cute one, I love how you can be all unglam and stuff with me hehe. Your actions all very cute and funny one, always make me laugh.

And yay we love rollercoasters! That Vianne so noob. You also damn on one, I LIKE. You too smart already sia. Gimme some.

Tho we become close this year only, i like being around you 'cause you always make my day with your auntiness hehehe.♥




JOZOETAY
Juzu.♥

Hi momma. I think you look damn matured but actually you inside is a kid one. You always do weird stuff that's funny one lor!

I know you always feel stressed but you should learn to destress, if not ah one day you sure explode. Teachers also always pick on you, but be strong ok!!! We are always here for you my love.♥




SHIHYUAN
nut.♥

HARRO. We only started talking like errrrrr a few months ago?
But I think you're super funny, like one of the funniest girls i know! Everytime Im with you I sure laugh until want to die.(literally)

I like how you always confide in me! Dont need to always say thank you la, its what friends are for right. You're always insecure but you really shouldnt be. Like i said, you r bweautiful hehahu. You'll find people who appreciate you one la, dont worry.

You migrating already, walau damn sian. Dont forget me hor, else i whack you.♥




RYANLIM
bombom.♥

PARKBOM, nuff said.
-
-
-

just kidding.
I also dont know why you all like to bully and disturb me so much lor. Yeah remember my first impression of you? Arrogant and mickey mouse LOLOLOL.

Our lives are so entirely different I also dont know how we're friends haha. But it's interesting to talk to you ah. Altho i dont understand the things you do sometimes but you're a good friend :>

Stop growing already ok.




DARRENLIANG
bros(or not?)♥

I also dont know whether we're bros anot LOL. You forever borrowing money from me one sighsigh.

Anyways i hope im still one of your top bros haha. I think you're nice when you dont bully me. My first impression of you was that you look like this: "-_-" hahahaha sorry x:

Dont hate me 'cause i say you're short ok :>




RHYNADESEE
ahnerd.♥

You so tiny and cute and fragile leh! But despite that you still quite fierce, always quarrel with Vianne one hahaa.

I think you're very thoughtful and sweet, I LIKE. You also very smart one, I dont understand how you guys can do it. Siaaaaaan.

Good luck with your qtboy ah hehe.♥




CHONGJIAYIN
ahchong.♥

You very kukubird one, sometimes I dont understand what you thinking haha. You silly girl. You seem very naive so must be careful ok!

I like how you're always smiling and making jokes even though not funny one hehe. Thanks for your attempts at entertainment huhu.

Even though you dont get your ideal results after working so hard, dont give up ok! 'Cause if you aim for the moon, even if you dont reach it, you'll land among the stars. :> good luck with your qtboy ah.♥




BENJAMINNG
sister.♥

NA LA NA LA give you your post. Where got people at 3-4am still come chase me for your post one. And keep 'priest' me to dont post this picture hehe, too bad!!!!

Met at the chalet and my first impression was "why this guy so tall and black one" HAHA. You damn ungentleman one, unlike Kenny. And you super HHGZ(you know what it is la hor) one, say wanna change for the better but still same pattern. *shake head

You always ask me random questions that I dont know the answer for one leh, 奇怪. Even tho we dont meet much, i hope you cope well with your studies ok. And stop acting like ahbeng/fisherman leh haha.

Ok i say finish the 'good words about you' already. bye and i hate you for sending me that stupid virus.♥




JONATHANKUA
jonkua.♥

I also dont know why i write this post for you lor. You're my 'friend-with-motives' knn. Aiya thanks for doing stupid things to make me laugh and i hate you for life bb.


--------------------

OMG FINALLY DONE. THAT TOOK ABOUT 5HOURS TO FINISH WTFUX AND ITS LIKE 5.32AM NOW.
Still have New Years' Resolution but i cannot tank already, gotta go sleep. Maybe another time.

Paiseh ah, the dedications at the back quite short cos i tired already LOLOL. 我对不起你们.

Going countdown with Joeyg and Darren tmrw huhu hope it turns out fine.
GOOD NIGHT! GOOD BYE 2011!